Gay Married Veterans Finally Get the Same Respect as Straight Military Couples (VIDEO)

vrijdag 30 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Maressa Brown 8 hours ago

Tracey & Maggie Cooper-HarrisWhen the Supreme Court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), it was easy to assume that the rights same-sex couples had been denied as a result of the law would be enstated ASAP. But that wasn't exactly the case. The law governing veterans' benefits, Title 38, still defined marriage as between opposite-sex spouses. So for couples like Tracy Cooper-Harris, a U.S. Army veterinarian who served in Iraq and was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, and her wife Maggie Cooper-Harris, it meant inequality still reigned and they were denied financial support for Tracy's medical costs that was readily available to heterosexual couples. That is ... until this week!

A federal court ruled on Wednesday that a married same-sex couple must be eligible for the same veteran benefits as married heterosexual couples. Hooray!!

Thank goodness this inequality has been set right. All you have to do is consider some embarrassing realities and cringeworthy facts to know veterans who are in same-sex marriages were getting the short end of the stick. For instance, according to her lawsuit, Cooper-Harris would be eligible for $124 more in aid were she married to a man. Ugh.

More from The Stir: Gay Soldiers' 'Marriage Leave' Shows Our Country's Love for All Military Families

Now, in light of this ruling, the Cooper-Harrises should get what they rightfully deserve, as will so many other couples in their shoes. While the Dept. of Veterans' Affairs has yet to respond to the ruling, the director of the VA, Eric Shinseki, told Senator Jeanne Shaheen of New Hampshire on August 14 that if Title 38 were "revised or determined to be unconstitutional," then the "VA will be prepared to update its policies and systems in a timely manner." Cheers. To. That!

What's your reaction to this ruling?

Image via Maury Phillips/Getty

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Maressa Brown

has enjoyed reporting and writing for a variety of entertainment and women's magazines and websites. More often than not, you'll find her blogging, hitting the gym, reading, researching something on her iPhone, laughing, chatting at an above-"normal" volume, or getting her caffeine fix.

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Maci Bookout Isn't Getting Married for Her Kid's Sake

donderdag 22 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Nicole Fabian-Weber 2 hours ago

Things are going well for Teen Mom Maci Bookout and boyfriend Taylor McKinney right now. Actually, things are going so well for the couple that Maci is talking marriage. She hearts Taylor, and Taylor hearts her, so why not just take the plunge already?

Okay, so that's not exactly how Maci put it, but pretty close. Here's what she had to say about her lovah:

"He’s like the identical version of me, except he’s a guy. We’re looking for the same things in a marriage," Maci said in an interview with In Touch Weekly. She then talked about how she considered getting back with Ryan Edwards, the father of her adorable 4-year-old son, Bentley. But then she realized that was a bad idea. "I love Taylor, not Ryan," she said.

Good for Maci. If anyone deserves happiness, she does. And getting back with Ryan -- just because he's the father of her child -- would be a bad idea for all parties involved, especially Bentley.

It takes maturity to know that what might seem like a short-term "fix" for you and/or your child isn't always the path that should be followed. Maci and Ryan didn't work out for a reason. And if they gave things another go, things would only wind up being more painful -- especially for Bentley -- in the end. Bentley's parents should both be with people who make them happy. Because a happy parent is a good parent.

Now, come on, Taylor! Pop the Q already!

Would you like to see Maci and Taylor get married?

Image via Maci Bookout/Twitter

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Couples Who Don't Face Each Other During Sex Shouldn't Get Married, Says Wacky Anti-Gay Congresswoman

woensdag 21 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Kiri Blakeley 17 hours ago

We've heard some odd reasons why gay people shouldn't be allowed to get legally married. Like that they "undermine" the institution of marriage. Like heterosexual people who get married for a split second don't? Or that they can't procreate. Like all heterosexual couples can? But this one is a doozy. Hold your hat. A congresswoman from Mexico reportedly said that gay people shouldn't be allowed to marry because they don't face each other during sex. Yes, Ana María Jiménez Ortiz, who represents the state of Puebla, which is considering legalizing gay marriage, reportedly said:

Marriage should only be considered in those relationships in which the members have sex while facing each other.

Ummm. WHAT?!

She also reportedly went on (and I'm not making this up):

A marriage should only be considered amongst people that can look at each other in the eye while having sexual intercourse, something that does not happen in homosexual couples.

After a backlash on Twitter, Ortiz backpeddled on her "face only" sex statement, but the damage was done. Let's face it (har!), there are lots of ways to have sex besides that which brings you eyeball to eyeball!

Hello, Ms. Ortiz. Oral sex? Minimal eye contact, I assure you. Doggie style, perhaps? You should try it. Okay, then there's 69. I won't explain. You figure it out.

Oh my goodness, has Ms. Ortiz not read the Kama Sutra? That's a hypothetical. I won't even get into Fifty Shades of Grey. Please let us not even consider blindfolds. Or blind people?!

There are so many ways to have sex and to have intimacy. The day that missionary sex becomes the sole way couples can have sex or they can't be legally married ... well, a lot of us would suddenly be divorced.

Who is to say what is "natural"? Plenty of animals don't look each other in the face when they have sex. Luckily, they don't need people like Ms. Ortiz.

This is the screwiest (har!) reason to be anti-gay marriage I've ever heard of. It's not just homophobic. It's, like, funaphobic.

Ms. Ortiz must be a riot in the bedroom.

Do you think that sex should always be face to face?

Image via Kainr/Flickr

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Every Married Woman Needs a Plan B in Case of Divorce

maandag 19 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by The Stir Bloggers 2 hours ago

I don't know about most divorced ladies, but I saw my split with my husband coming -- by a few years. I'd brought it up a few times, and he kept talking me out of it, which was sort of a relief. But I knew I was just postponing the inevitable. So I came up with the list: My Plan B. Everything I needed to put in order before I could divorce my husband for real, this time.

I'm so glad I made that list and followed through with it. I'm glad I didn't wallow in denial -- or in false hope. Some might say I doomed my marriage by giving up that hope and planning for the worst. But who's to say what the worst is? I say planning for a split is the most hopeful thing a woman can do.

First on my list was to get a full-time job with health insurance. Before I'd just sort of pieced together a career with freelance this and that. But if I was going to be on my own, I'd need much more stability. No more swinging from vine to vine. Plus, I knew I'd need a reason to get dressed and leave my home every day. I knew working from home in my pajamas would not be conducive to my recovery.

But it wasn't enough for me to just get "a" job -- because I had time, I went after the writing career I'd never thought before I could pull off. Something about taking the bold step of admitting I was headed toward a divorce also emboldened me to stop monkeying around with my career and start working at something I actually wanted to do. As long as I was thinking about what I wanted my life to look like, it just made sense to apply that to my career.

And then I got a hold of my finances. I should have been doing this all along, but I created a spreadsheet tracking all my expenses. I wanted to find out if I could actually make it on my own. To my great relief, the math all worked out.

That's not everything from Plan B, but it's enough to show something interesting: Planning for the "worst" outcome actually improved my life before I even started to divorce my husband. Suddenly it was no longer about giving up -- it was about making smart choices and planning for the future. Even if I hadn't decided to divorce, I would have been moving ahead with a clearer vision of what I wanted my life to look like.

You never know what's going to happen next. It may not be divorce -- your husband could die suddenly. Anything could happen. Viewing your life through the lens of "what if" can be just the motivation and perspective shift you need to make changes that will make you happier regardless of what happens with your marriage.

Have you ever made plans for what you'd do if you lost or divorced your spouse?

Image via Horlia Varlan/Flickr

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Kim Kardashian and Kanye West Are Already in Couples' Therapy Before They've Even Gotten Married

woensdag 14 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Adriana Velez 2 hours ago

They're not even married yet, but it looks like Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are headed to the therapist's office. Yes, it's couples' therapy for Kimye. They're supposedly seeking counseling to help them adjust to life as parents. Well, as celeb parents, that is. Stars, they're just like us! Except they talk about their tabloid coverage, epic brawls with the paparazzi, and rumors of affairs with French DJs while in therapy.

"It’s helping them get through it," says one of Kimye's blabbermouth friends, meaning becoming parents. "Kim knows Kanye’s an alpha male, but she finds it hard handling his moods. Kanye is a very different person when it’s just him and Kim -- she melts when she sees him holding their little girl." Kanye, an alpha male? Moody much? NOOOO! I never would have guessed.

Apparently Kanye turns into grumpy "papa bear" when there are too many visitors at their house. Wait, did I say their house? I mean Kris Jenner's house. Yikes. This couples' therapy, it's happening right now every day, right?

Well good for them. I think a little bit of counseling would be helpful for just about any set of new parents. Didn't Prince William and Kate get some counseling before they had Georgie? It's good just to get a reality check, set your intentions, make sure your expectations are realistic. But wow, for Kim and Kanye, therapy as new parents should be mandatory. I think we all know Kanye is a piece of work on his own -- but there are also the demands of celebrityhood.

Oh yeah, and there are also all those rumors of Kanye straying on Kim while she was pregnant. They should probably talk that out, even if the rumors are false. Even if you're not a big fan of Kanye, I think we can all agree that what's best for little Nori is for Mommy and Daddy to get along.

Do you think couples' therapy will be enough to keep Kim and Kanye together longer?

Image via Pacific Coast News

Click the "Like" button below if you're Krazy for the Kardashians! ABOUT THE AUTHOR Adriana Velez

is a staff writer who dabbles in food, parenting, news, entertainment, molecular biology, and anything else that that pops into her head. She lives with her elementary school-aged son in Brooklyn, land of urban farms and artisan everything.  

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Kevin Federline's Bride Victoria Prince Married Him in a Dress Fit for Britney Spears

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AppId is over the quota
by Mary Fischer 3 hours ago

Her marriage to Kevin Federline came as quite a surprise last weekend, and now photos of Victoria Prince's wedding gown have been released. It's very Las Vegas, to say the least.

With a sweetheart neckline, tons of beading on the bodice, and a skirt of lace and tulle complete with a floral print -- this thing has Sin City wedding written all over it. You know, like something Britney Spears would pick out. (Eye roll.)

As someone who prefers very simple wedding dresses with little to no embellishment or detail, the gown certainly isn't something I would've chosen or even envisioned for my big day.

But still, she really did look beautiful. Considering Victoria married K-Fed, her attire is surprisingly clean-cut versus what you'd expect from his bride.

No offense to Kev, but he's got a bit of the bad boy thing going on, and somehow I picture him marrying someone in a skimpy, possibly leather mini-dress instead of a full-length gown. Even Victoria's hair is very traditional, pulled back into a simple updo and worn with a mid-length veil.

But you know what was really, really sweet about her wedding style? Victoria and Kevin's daughter, Jordan Kay, wore a little dress that had similar detail to her mom's, which is beyond adorable.

It's obvious that Kevin and Victoria were over-the-moon to finally make things official by getting hitched. They are clearly very much in love and ready to take this big step in their lives together.

I guess it really doesn't matter what Victoria wore -- because the smile on her face was the most beautiful part of her ensemble for sure.

What do you think of Victoria's wedding dress?

Image via Splash

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Mary Fischer

is the writer behind The Mommyologist, and the mom of a future famous comedian. Her current loves include cosmopolitans, reality TV, and shoes that don't pinch her feet.

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8 Signs You're Married to a Narcissist

donderdag 1 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Kiri Blakeley 2 hours ago

Narcissists are all over the news lately. There's Anthony Weiner, who seems to think it's no one's business but his own (and maybe his wife's -- at least when she finds out about it) that he chronically sexts random young women. Never mind that he wants to, you know, run the biggest city in the country. There's Ariel Castro. Who seems to believe that he had every right to nab three women off the street and hold them captive for 10 years because he had sexual needs to fulfill. The narcissist is all about himself. Not all of them bring it to the extreme that Weiner and Castro do -- many classic narcissists are upstanding, successful members of society. Experts say that most people on Wall Street are narcissists. No surprise there. But could you be married to one? And what could this mean for you? Here are 8 clues that you're married to a narcissist.

1. Narcissists put themselves above everything else. Can't afford a new sports car? Doesn't matter if the narcissist wants it -- even if that means not letting your kid go to summer camp or get a tutor. What the narcissist wants reigns supreme. Does the narcissist want to meet an old girlfriend for dinner? Then he has every right to. You don't control him! If you're with a narcissist, you will continually find that your time, money, schedule, and energy revolve around his wants and needs.

2. Putting you down. As paradoxical as it seems, narcissists are obsessed with themselves but actually very insecure. So in order to puff themselves up, they have to put you down. It can be anything from telling you flat-out how stupid and incompetent you are to subtle put-downs that you may hardly even notice at first, something like, "That color only looks good on thin people."

3. Dysfunctional family. Almost all narcissists come from broken or dysfunctional homes. Their narcissism was a needed survival mechanism at the time. Now he can't get out of it -- and probably doesn't see any reason to.

4. Scared of feelings. Narcissists don't like talking or even thinking about feelings. They often won't admit that they're angry, even if they are throwing things against the walls. If something traumatic happens, they'll deny they are sad about it.

5. Idol worship. Narcissists often have people they worship, who can do no wrong. Usually it's a boss or mentor or someone else they see as successful. Narcissists are often obsessed with professional success. If the narcissist's idol ever shows a flaw, the narcissist is outraged.

6. Self-aggrandizing. Narcissists can do it all -- put together a PowerPoint presentation whilst skiing down a snowy mountain and whipping up a five-course meal all while closing a massive real estate deal. At least according to them.

7. Gifted liar. Narcissists frequently lie -- about both big and small things. You may not catch them for years because they are good at justifying themselves and coming up with excuses. After you've caught a narcissist in a lie, even a huge one, it's not unusual for YOU to somehow end up being the one who apologizes.

8. You feel like utter crap. If you generally feel duped, put upon, tricked, manipulated, lied to, criticized, belittled, worthless, and humiliated in your relationship -- then chances are you are with a narcissist.

Have you ever been in a relationship with a narcissist?

Image via iStock

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Jenelle Evans Gives a Hysterical Excuse for Living With Another Dude While Still Married

zaterdag 13 juli 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Nicole Fabian-Weber Yesterday at 3:45 PM

One thing you've gotta give Teen Mom Jenelle Evans credit for: The woman does not run out of excuses. Ever. Jenelle recently said that, although she's currently living with new boyfriend Nathan Griffith while technically still married to Courtland Rogers, she's not committing adultery because Courtland cheated first.

Now, don't get me wrong, I was just as happy as the next guy to see Jenelle and Courtland part ways -- they're one of history's worst couples. And if she wants to be with someone else right now, that's fine. She and Rogers are estranged. But is she really using the ol' "he did it first" excuse. What is this, second grade?

Jenelle need not paint herself as the "scorned woman" here. Because she's not. Yeah, Courtland may have cheated first, but if Jenelle actually gave a rat's ass, she would have "mourned" their relationship first, as opposed to diving head-first into a new relationship. In fact, I'm guessing Jenelle was thrilled Courtland cheated, because that way, she was off the hook for anything she did afterwards.

I couldn't help but let out the most audible of sighs when I read Jenelle's tweet on the whole sitch. She wrote: "It's not a sin if one spouse has been unfaithful. CR was unfaithful and we r separated." First of all, easy there with the Bible talk, killer. And second of all, stop making excuses. Yes, what Courtland did was really, really wrong -- and he's one of the world's biggest trashballs -- but don't get it twisted, Jenelle. His wrong doesn't make you right.

What do you think of this?

Image via Jenelle Evans/Instagram

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