Hospital Denies Mom Food Because She Isn't Breastfeeding

maandag 9 september 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Nicole Fabian-Weber 2 hours ago

If you thought you've seen it all in the never-ending battle of breastfeeding versus formula feeding, I'd like to present to you the mother who was denied free hospital food because she wasn't nursing. A mother of three accompanied her 5-month-old baby to the pediatric ward, where he was admitted for a lung infection, and when the staff was made aware that she wasn't breastfeeding, they informed her that she could have some toast in the morning, but beyond that, she'd have to pay for any food she wanted -- which isn't the case for mothers who nurse. "Because you're not breastfeeding, you won't get meals here," the mom who wishes to remain nameless said she was told. And the thing that bothered her the most, more than the ridiculous policy, was the fact that she had to leave her recovering infant son alone to go get herself some food.

"For me to go and get some decent food, I have to leave my child," she said. "I understand they are busy but that's why I think there's more reason to feed us so we don't have to leave our children." She recalled a particularly upsetting instance when she left her child and she returned to find him screaming. "It's not so easy on a mom who cares about her children to go and get herself some nutrition when you come back to an anxious, upset baby," she said.

And adding insult to injury is the fact that this particular mom wanted to nurse. Quite badly, actually, but it just didn't work out, due to severe food allergies and reflux. Bottle-feeding with prescription formula was the option that made the most sense for her family.

If this is this particular hospital's attempt at increasing breastfeeding, boy have they missed the mark. Denying the mother of a sick child food because she's using formula is almost too insane to even wrap my head around. This woman is being punished because breastfeeding didn't work out for her -- by a hospital. Aren't hospitals supposed to be places mothers feel comfortable and not "less than"? Mothers who formula feed their kids -- because something went wrong, or because they simply didn't feel like nursing -- get enough crap for other women already. (And, yes, I breastfed in case you're wondering.)

This needs to stop. Yes, there have been countless studies, touting the benefits of breastfeeding, but not everyone is going to do it. Let's all just deal with that fact and move on. A hospital forcing a mother to leave her sick child because she bottle-feeds is not the way to get more moms to nurse. In fact, it only fuels the fire of this never-ending battle.

What do you think of this?

Image via nerissa's ring/Flickr

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Mom Sues Employer for Not Letting Her Take a 'Breastfeeding Break'

dinsdag 20 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Nicole Fabian-Weber 2 hours ago

A new mom was fired from her job after she refused to return to work after maternity leave when she was told she was not able to tack an extra 15 minutes onto her break in order to breastfeed her baby. Kate Abra Frederick worked as a child support officer with the New Hampshire Department of Health and Human Services, and normally, she was allowed a 15-minute break. But being that her son refused to take a bottle, Kate wanted a little more time so she could run over to a daycare that was two minutes from her job. Her employer said no, and now Kate has filed suit with the federal Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.

I don't think that moms deserve special treatment or extra rights just because they have kids. But I do think that, while we're constantly being bombarded with messages of how "breast is best", the United States sure doesn't make it easy for nursing moms. Especially nursing moms who have jobs.

The pressure of returning to work after you have a baby is enormous. It's a low-grade anxiety that constantly sits in the back of your mind during your maternity leave. And I can't imagine how a mother whose baby refuses a bottle would feel. The stress is unimaginable. Some women are blessed with employers who are understanding and helpful to breastfeeding mothers, but many aren't. And in the case of Kate Abra Fredrick, she basically was forced to choose between her job and her child. And when faced with those two options, the decision is easy. But it had to have been infuriating. 

If Kate's employer had granted her the extra 15 minutes and she began taking advantage of it, that wouldn't have been right. I assume her intent in asking was to help make her return -- for both herself and her baby -- easier. When her son eventually learned to eat from a bottle, I'm guessing she would have just given him pumped breast milk. Offering no leeway on something like this is just ridiculous and gave her no other choice but to quit. She was asking for 15 minutes, not an hour.

Breast may be best, but it sure isn't easiest. Wow.

Do you think Kate should have been granted the extra 15 minutes?

Image via nerissa's ring/Flickr

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'Teen Mom' Star's Breastfeeding Experience Brings Her to Tears

vrijdag 16 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota

Teen Mom may be a show aimed at scaring teenagers away from parenthood, but the show has been attracting older moms to MTV pretty much from the beginning. And if you're a mom who ascribes to natural parenting methods, you're going to love Teen Mom 3, especially star Katie Yeager.

Katie is a natural birthing, extended breastfeeding mama! And she sat down with The Stir this week to talk about breastfeeding on TV, donating her breast milk, and why sometimes breastfeeding would move her to tears!

On breastfeeding her now almost 2-year-old daughter:

I went 16 months breastfeeding Molli. Sometimes I wish I could still breastfeed her! It's one thing that I've always said: at least try. I sometimes would cry because I was so happy. That's one thing that I gave my daughter.

It felt so good whenever anyone said congratulations on your breastfeeding success; I know a lot of moms have trouble with it.

On donating milk:

I donated milk for eight months, I think, to Primary Children's [Medical Center], which is out of Salt Lake City. I would pump and send it out because I was in Wyoming still. I was grateful to be able to do that, and once Molli weaned, up until I lost my supply, I donated there.

I'm very proud that I was able to share that bond with my child.

On why she chose to breastfeed:

I was researching it when I was pregnant. I did the natural birth too, and I felt like this was the next step. I felt like I wanted to at least try it and I wanted to get that colostrum out, make sure she gets those benefits. And, definitely, I was hooked!

After I got through the first month, which was like the worst ever, I would cry and cry and cry -- and once I got over that rough patch, I was like, I love this. I want to breastfeed forever!

More From The Stir: 'Teen Mom 3' Stars Rock Matching Necklaces & Share How to Get Your Own!

I tell everyone, if you're not happy, if your baby can tell that this is pain for you and you're crying and you're upset about it, then don't feel bad! It just was something that worked for me and that I loved, and if I were to have another baby, I'd definitely not get the epidural and definitely breastfeed because that's just what I know. 

I don't know how to make a bottle. I don't know how to mix formula. I would be lost! I'd be crying because I don't know how to make formula!

It's just something that I felt was the best for me, and anytime I meet another woman that is in the same situation, I geek out and bond with them, of course, just like any mother does.

On being able to share her breastfeeding with the whole world on MTV:

I'm proud of being able to do it at such a young age, and it's definitely something ... if somebody needs help, I'll be the first one to say it'll be okay, you can make it through it, this is what I did, this is how you can do it if you really want it.

I'm definitely a big breastfeeding supporter.

***

Katie isn't the only mom from the show to breastfeed -- Kailyn Lowry from Teen Mom 2 has spoken in the past about her own breastfeeding, and both Briana DeJesus and Alex Sekella told The Stir they did as well (albeit not for 16 months) -- but she is definitely the first to do so extensively on camera. The Stir got a sneak peek at the first episode of Teen Mom 3, and Katie is often seen with a blanket over her as little Molli eats.

Are you excited to see a crunchy mama on Teen Mom?

Image by Jeanne Sager

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What to Wear to Show Your Support for Breastfeeding Moms

donderdag 15 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Tracy Odell 2 hours ago

Happy Public Display of Breastfeeding Day! And Happy Breastfeeding Awareness month! To celebrate, over at The Prowl today, we're collectively putting together a board of t-shirts and onesies showing pride for nursing mamas. If you're breastfeeding and want to proudly proclaim it to the world or you just want to support nursing moms, here are some shirts that will spread your lactivist message.

Peace, Love, and Breastfeeding. This shirt is more subtle than some others in its message and the simple design is cute and stylish.

Nursing moms really are superheroes. Who else could deal with those flailing arms, leaking ta-tas, and the endless search to find someplace semi-private to pump? This t-shirt gets it right.

And let's not forget the little milk drinkers out there. They can show their pride for their nursing mamas, too (and look darn cute doing it!).

To see more t-shirts and onesies celebrating breastfeeding mamas, stop on over to The Prowl. See what else we've collected so far and add your own ideas to the board!

Click the "Like" button below to get Natural Parenting stories on Facebook. ABOUT THE AUTHOR Tracy Odell

is the mom of two young, energetic boys. She's quite fond of reality TV, books, anything caffeinated and exclamation points(!). In her spare time, she works as Executive Vice President at CafeMom, Publisher of The Stir, and is the co-founder of The Prowl.

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Mom Harassed for Breastfeeding 16-Day-Old Outside Daughter's Dance Class (VIDEO)

maandag 5 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Jeanne Sager 3 hours ago

Here we go again. Another breastfeeding mom has tangled with a real boob about her right to nurse her baby in public. Only Lucy Eades's breastfeeding discrimination case might just take the prize for craziest place a mom was given grief for feeding her kid.

The incident -- which Eades' husband caught on video -- happened at the Burleson Recreation Center in Burleson, Texas. You know what recreation centers are for, don't you?

That's right ... families. So a family-friendly place, a place for moms and kids, had a problem with a mom feeding her ... kid?

Sigh.

As if it isn't hard enough out there for nursing moms to get respect in shopping centers, courthouses, and restaurants, now kid-centric establishments are a problem too?

The City of Burleson defended itself by explaining that it was hosting a camp for 5- to 13-year-olds the day Eades was trying to breastfeed her 16-day-old daughter while her older child attended a dance class:

To be respectful of everyone's rights we asked the women to cover up. There is nothing in the law that prohibits the city from requiring a mother to cover up. We also offered a room in an attempt to be more accommodative. The city did not attempt to prohibit breastfeeding and we fully support the freedom of mothers to breastfeed as long as it doesn't infringe on someone else's freedom.

Giant. Eye. Roll.

Come on y'all! The "freedom" of a bunch of kids is not at risk because a mom breastfeeds in their presence, especially not if they're from homes where a mom breastfeeds or their parents have taught them that breastfeeding is normal. Heck, the more kids see breastfeeding, the more likely THEY are to breastfeed (or support a partner doing so) when they grow up. It's like that whole circle of life thing Elton John sang about.

What's really at issue here is why a facility would present opportunities for children, claiming to be a place where parents can take their kids, and then not support parents. Being able to breastfeed at a recreation center for kids is just as important as being able to find a diaper changing station at the same facility.

Either you're family-friendly or you're not, and as long as you're not OK with breastfeeding moms, you're NOT family-friendly.

Do you expect the places where you take your kids be breastfeeding-friendly? Have you ever experienced trouble in one?

Image via _shWard_/Flickr

Click the "Like" button below to get Natural Parenting stories on Facebook. ABOUT THE AUTHOR Jeanne Sager

writes articles for The Stir by day, slays closet monsters and bounds through bedtime stories with her elementary schooler by night. The Phineas and Ferb soundtrack reverberates through her brain.

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Kim Kardashian’s 1,200-Calorie Diet Sounds Too Extreme for a Breastfeeding Mom

vrijdag 26 juli 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Adriana Velez 16 hours ago

Fifty pounds. That's how much weight Kim Kardashian reportedly gained during her pregnancy with North. Fifty pounds -- at least. Some are saying as much as 65. And now the pressure is on to lose it all in celebrity-rapid speed. Think breastfeeding is going to do it alone? Yes, actually, I do. Hell no! We hear Kim's on a 1,200-calorie diet to lose that baby fat. She's slurping down veggie juices concocted by her new personal chef. It sounds amaaaahzing...ly torturous.

It's like Kim has to be punished for gaining all that weight. Enjoyed all that frozen yogurt, did we Ms. Kardashian? Well now it's time to pay! Mwa ha ha ha ha! So this is what Kim is supposedly doing to lose the baby weight.

A source tells Star magazine:

She has a chef making her fresh green juices of kale, celery, spinach, collard greens, and cilantro. They make up 80 percent of her diet, and the other 20 percent consists of low-fat chicken and a light salad or steamed veggies.

And when she's not choking down juices and steamed chicken, she's breastfeeding like crazy:

She kept hearing that she would lose a lot of weight if she did breast-feed. That’s why she’s forcing herself to do it.

Wait a minute, what's with this "forcing" business? I thought she LOVED breastfeeding. I thought it was so natural for her. So basically what this source is saying is that Kim is living in a 24/7 hellscape of lactation and hunger. And let us not forget that she's probably also working out, too. That sounds like a lot of fun for everyone. What do they do, leave her alone in a padded cell? Because I would not want to live under the same roof with this starving new mom.

Supposedly you burn an extra 500 calories a day from breastfeeding. You know what that means? You are HUNGRY like never before. I didn't eat that much more while I was pregnant. But after? Man, I was hungry. I had my chocolate cake with Oprah ritual every afternoon. I ate chocolate-covered almonds all day long. I still remember the moment about a month after the baby when I was standing in my kitchen around midnight, eating New York Super Chunk Fudge directly out of the carton, when a light bulb went over my head: I should probably stop eating ice cream every day if I really want to lose that baby weight.

Okay, so it took me a whole nine months to lose the 30 pounds I gained during pregnancy. That's how long it's supposed to take. At least I was still pleasant and civil because I wasn't starving. Basically my weight-loss plan was to eat healthy foods, stop eating ice cream and chocolate cake every day, and breastfeed. It worked, but slowly.

Bonus: I kept breastfeeding after I lost the baby weight and got even skinnier. But that doesn't work for everyone. Some women can't shed those last five pounds until they stop breastfeeding.

Anyway ... Kim's gonna do what Kim's gonna do. I just hope that in the midst of this juice torture, she also changes her tastes and palate a little bit, so by the time she's finished with the diet, she finds herself craving fresh fruit and veggies more, and French fries less. Because that's what's going to keep her a healthy mama for life.

What do you think about Kim's rumored extreme diet?

Image via Pacific Coast News

Click the "Like" button below to get Natural Parenting stories on Facebook. ABOUT THE AUTHOR Adriana Velez

is a staff writer who dabbles in food, parenting, news, entertainment, molecular biology, and anything else that that pops into her head. She lives with her elementary school-aged son in Brooklyn, land of urban farms and artisan everything.  

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Waitress Writes Must-See Note to Breastfeeding Mother on Restaurant Receipt (PHOTO)

donderdag 18 juli 2013

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AppId is over the quota

I believe breastfeeding in public shouldn't be an issue. We all eat in public so why can't a baby? Though far too many breastfeeding moms and babies have felt the daggers shooting from people's eyes when they disapprove or feel it's an obscene act. That's why when someone is thankful for feeding a baby that liquid gold, we have to celebrate.

Jackie Johnson-Smith was eating at Fong's in Des Moines, Iowa, when her baby got hungry. She was breastfeeding him and he was quite fussy so after a little while, Jackie went to the car with her infant while her husband took care of the check. What happened next made her speechless and emotional. And I got emotional as well. I reached out to Jackie and she shared the details.

Jackie said on her Facebook page that she breastfed three children "in countless of places both pleasant and unpleasant, discreetly and out in the open." Like many of us who have nursed our kids in public, she has received many looks and stares of the negative variety, but what happened at Fong's the other night overshadowed all of that. 

The server at Fong's, a woman named Bodi, wrote:

I bought one of your pizzas. Please thank your wife for breastfeeding!

Thank you, Bodi, for being accepting. Thank you, Bodi, for honoring a child's right to eat whenever and wherever that child is hungry. Thank you.

When I emailed Jackie, she said that she hopes something like this could help breastfeeding mothers feel more acceptance and more comfortable when nursing in public. I'm a mother of twins and I will admit I never felt comfortable nursing both my babies at the same time. I wish I didn't cower to society's view that breasts are sexual all the time. But I did nurse my babies in public, just one at a time.

I asked Jackie if she had been discriminated against for nursing in public and her views on how society treats breastfeeding mothers. She responded:

I have definitely been made to feel uncomfortable and unwanted. With my first nursling I rarely breastfed in public. I avoided it with all costs, nursing in our car right before entering an establishment and disappearing back to the car to nurse again. All out of pure societal fear. Thankfully I gained more confidence with each new baby. Having said that though I have encountered countless stares and obvious looks of distaste and uncomfortableness. I once overheard a woman mentioning how there were nursing rooms available in the mall while I sat near her nursing my son with a cover on. I have had people leave the room because they were so uncomfortable with me nursing in their presence.

I know there are more and more nursing mothers every day, but do we see them nursing in public? We either don't or they're so skilled you have no idea they're even nursing. Society has scared these mothers to be afraid to nurse in public. Will they be the next woman to be asked to stop or leave? Will she get confronted by a stranger who disapproves of how or where she is feeding her child? Nursing mothers are often seen as self-righteous as we band together. We're often misunderstood. Do we think breastfeeding is best? Of course we do, but it isn't a we're better than you thing, it's very much an equality thing. I would never want to make a woman feel inferior or uncomfortable about her parenting choices. Formula feeders can feed their babies anytime, any place. No one is offended by a bottle. No one thinks our babies shouldn't be fed either, but they are often quick to let us know that they want us to take it somewhere else where they don't have to see it. It is our right and our choice, yet we're always scrutinized for it. Society has made breasts sexual and people cannot cope with normalizing them. It still astonishes me how something so natural and rooted in nature can be so construed by society. Society doesn't bat an eyelash at any other mammal nursing her young. It's often ooed and ahh'd about even at zoos and petting farms. But ... women don't get that same support.

What happened to me was special and women are clinging to it because they're searching for the same affirmations. ... I don't need a pat on the back to feed my child, but that pat felt SO good. And I didn't even realize I may have been longing for it for far longer than I could have realized.

Jackie found Bodi's husband's on Facebook and wrote him a thank you note to pass along to her. She wants to return to Fong's to thank her in person as well. Jackie shared that note with me:

Please thank your wife for me. I should have re-entered the restaurant and thanked her in person. I still should. I didn't come from a breastfeeding family. I myself was formula fed as was common place through my family. My breastfeeding journey has been deeply personal with endless woes and triumphs. Your wife touched me in a place in my heart that is so tender, so raw and rooted and so very proud. Unbeknownst to her at the time it was also my 33rd birthday. I felt an amazing sense of belonging and optimism that day because of your wife's beautiful sentiment that is still carrying me days later. I couldn't even fathom two nights ago how many people my post would and could touch. Women across the country are tearing up and being touched by it because breastfeeding is so innately personal and society has made it so vulnerable. The widespread sharing of it is just a true testament of not only the need for normalizing breastfeeding and making breastfeeding mothers feel welcome and comfortable nursing in public, but in turn the need for women supporting and empowering one another.

That is exactly it ... women do need to support each other. No matter what. Bodi's small gesture is huge. It's refreshing. And beautiful. We all need to support and empower each other more.

And Jackie, you are a beautiful woman inside and out. Happy birthday.

What do you think of Bodi's note on the check? Have you ever been commended or chastised for breastfeeding in public?

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