Divorced Couple Forced to Split Their House in Half and Live Under the Same Roof

dinsdag 17 september 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Mary Fischer 2 hours ago

Can you imagine living in the same house as your ex-spouse after your divorce was final? Well, that's exactly what's happening to one couple in Spain. A judge has decided that their home should be split into two separate spaces -- because he believes it's what's best for the well being of the couple's children, and it will benefit them financially.

Their pad is a 2,700-square-foot apartment, and supposedly it's going to be split in half so the wife can live upstairs while the husband resides downstairs.

And while it's not exactly the worst arrangement in the world given the fact that they will at least have their own spaces -- it definitely does lend itself to more conflict if they have trouble treating each other civilly.

And what if the two units in the home don't have separate entrances? Yeah, that could get a little bit awkward, especially when one of them moves on and brings home a date for a night cap, if you catch my drift.

Huh. I may be going out on a bit of a limb here -- but maybe if these two had been ordered to live in different areas of the house a while ago, they wouldn't be going through a divorce right now. Come on ... think about it for a second. What if you had part of your house that was strictly designated as yours where your husband was not permitted to enter? You know, like your own private bathroom that smells like lavender and doesn't have towels thrown on the floor.

Or what if you had your very own bedroom complete with a big, fluffy bed where the sheets are perfectly tucked in and you don't have to fight anyone for the covers at night? (I could get behind that. Just throwing it out there.)

And I'm sure most husbands wouldn't complain about having a man cave to retreat to when they need a little time on their own. Maybe if the dude in Spain had one, it would've been just enough to do the trick and get their relationship back on track again.

Maybe I'm crazy, but I'm thinking a lot of fights could be avoided if couples had a little bit more breathing room.

Wishful thinking, I'm sure -- but wouldn't it be funny if living apart is exactly what these two need to find their way back together? Stranger things have happened.

Could you share your home with your ex?

Image via Reading Tom/Flickr

Click "Like" if you're a single mom — and proud! ABOUT THE AUTHOR Mary Fischer

is the writer behind The Mommyologist, and the mom of a future famous comedian. Her current loves include Pinot Grigio on ice and Harry Styles -- in that order.

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Students Forced to Pee in Trash Can During School Lockdown Should Stop Whining About It

woensdag 21 augustus 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Kiri Blakeley 4 hours ago

So let's just pretend that your kid could be in danger. Serious danger. Like your kid is in school and gunshots are heard. The school goes into lockdown. And then, your kid has to pee. Badly. The kid asks to be escorted to the bathroom but the answer is "no," because, well, there could be people who want to shoot you. Ya know, that kind of thing. So the teacher makes your kid go to the bathroom in the trash can.

Do you a) thank the teacher for having such a dangerous job, which I'm sure the teacher never imagined in a million years would be a dangerous job when he or she signed up for it; b) explain to your child that during emergencies, sometimes you have to make adjustments -- even embarrassing ones; c) demand an investigation and have your child talk to the media about this supposedly horrifically embarrassing incident. I think we all know which option one parent chose.

It all started when several people reported hearing what sounded like gunshots from a wooded area near a school in St. Cloud, Florida. Like all schools are trained to do these days (what does that say about this country?!), the school went into voluntary lockdown mode, even though police were called and couldn't find the source of the gunshots.

So far, so smart, right?

Until two students, one whose diabetes makes her have to urinate more frequently, had to pee. The teacher, not wanting to send them out into the hallway where, you know, God knows what could be lurking, had the girls pee in a trash can behind his desk.

"It was very embarrassing," said the 13-year-old "victim."

Embarrassing? Sure. Was she alive to tell the tale? Yes. Was anyone grateful about that? No.

Then instead of, say, forgetting about the peeing incident, an investigation was launched and two dozen students were required to write down their eyewitness accounts of said peeing incident. Yes, kids who probably would have gotten over the horrible trauma of listening to their classmates whizz in a can instead had to relive (relieve? har!) the trauma all over again.

And then the teacher actually had to DEFEND his choice, telling the principal in an email:

I felt that the best solution for keeping her safe and also preventing her from being embarrassed was for her to go (to the bathroom) behind my desk. My primary concern was keeping the kids healthy and out of the halls during the lockdown while preserving them from the embarrassment of wetting themselves. I would want the same done for my future children.

You would think if peeing in a bucket were such a problem, perhaps there would have been a protocol to follow for these teachers who are being put in these situations. They signed up to teach, not to hide kids from crazed madmen with guns. Unfortunately, this is now part of the curriculum. But not only did the school not have any policy for what to do in these cases, it actually contacted child services to ask about reporting the teacher for child abuse!

The teacher has been fired -- though supposedly (cough, cough) not for this incident.

We live in times when kids can actually get blown away at school. Sandy Hook taught us that. Isn't their safety more important than a little embarrassment?!

Do you think the teacher made the wrong decision?

Image via kalleboo/Flickr

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Missing Oregon Boy's Mom Forced to Give Up Chance to Find Her Son

woensdag 31 juli 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Jeanne Sager 2 hours ago

Ugh. Kyron Horman's mom has been dealt another horrible blow. Remember the sweet-faced little boy who went missing sometime after attending a science fair at his Oregon elementary school in 2010? The then 7-year-old is still missing, and now a lawsuit against stepmother Terri Horman is dead in the water.

Kryon's mom, Desiree Young, has officially pulled the $10 million suit against Terri, the woman Young suspects knows what happened to her little boy. Kyron's mom says she can't move forward unless cops release information necessary for her case. The problem? The cops can't release that information because it's part of the investigation into Kyron's disappearance.

Talk about a catch-22!

Terri Horman was the last person to see Kyron alive. Kyron's dad, Kaine Horman, has allegedly filed for divorce because he too thinks she was somehow involved in the child's disappearance.

And Young has said her lawsuit wasn't about the money. It was about getting answers about what happened to Kyron.

But she can't get answers because the police can't give her information. But the police can't give her information because they don't have the answers either!

Jeez Louise, can this woman catch a break? I'm not questioning the cops here; they're just doing their jobs. I don't really know that they can do anything BUT what they're doing. They just need a break in this case so they can help this family.

That's what makes this so frustrating. The cops, the professionals, can't get anywhere in three years.

A lawsuit seemed like Desiree Young's last chance to actually get answers about what happened to her little boy. Now that chance is gone.

Quite frankly, the only chances that remain are someone screwing up and getting caught -- which is pretty unlikely after three years -- or that the new attention to the case from the dropped lawsuit will prompt someone, somewhere to come forward. That's probably just as unlikely, but for Desiree's sake, for Kyron's sake, I hold out hope.

There's only so many devastating blows a mom can take.

Have you followed Kyron's case? What's your hunch?

Image via National Center for Missing and Exploited Kids

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Jeanne Sager

writes articles for The Stir by day, slays closet monsters and bounds through bedtime stories with her elementary schooler by night. The Phineas and Ferb soundtrack reverberates through her brain.

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Rape Victim Forced to Watch Video of Her Own Rape

maandag 29 juli 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Adriana Velez 1 hour ago

I don't even understand why this was necessary. A man is on trial for a rape that was apparently caught by a security camera. So what does the judge do? He forces the rape victim to watch the video of her own attack so she can be cross-examined by the defense. Mohammed Azim was accused of smashing a bottle over a woman's head, dragging her by the hair into a factory, and raping her for 25 minutes. He was convicted. But did the victim really have to go through this in order for Azim to be found guilty?

I think Rape Crisis chief executive Yvonne Traynor speaks for most of us when she says, "I am appalled this woman had been through enough and then to be shown this in court to torture her again shows an appalling lack of consideration and common sense." Lack of consideration, ya think? Maybe I'd put it this way: Just plain cruel.

And lack of common sense -- can someone please explain why the victim needed to sit there in court and watch her own goddamn 25-minute-long rape? What questions did the defense need to ask about that? "Is that you in the video?" "Was this excruciatingly long attack done against your will?" "Are we a bunch of insensitive assholes?" Yes to all three. I would think the video is there as evidence more for the jury's consideration, and they could watch it with the victim out of the room.

And if, for whatever reason, the defense truly needed to question the victim on details in the video, couldn't the victim at least view the video in private, and not in court with everyone else?

Not to mention, how useful is the victim's testimony even going to be after she's gone through the emotional turmoil of watching her own rape? Wouldn't she be a more reliable witness if she were in a calmer, more emotionally neutral state? I think so.

Anyway, like I said, Azim was convicted, so I suppose this story could be worse. He faces 16 years in prison, which seems a little short to me. The judge said something about "you're lucky you didn't get mandatory life," and I'm kind of thinking, Yeah, why didn't he get life? What is with this judge?!?

Do you think a rape victim should ever have to watch a video of her own attack in court?

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Adriana Velez

is a staff writer who dabbles in food, parenting, news, entertainment, molecular biology, and anything else that that pops into her head. She lives with her elementary school-aged son in Brooklyn, land of urban farms and artisan everything.  

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Trayvon Martin Has Forced Me to Face My Biggest Fear as the Mother of an African American Boy

vrijdag 19 juli 2013

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AppId is over the quota
by Ericka Sóuter 16 hours ago

George Zimmerman's trial may be over, but the wounds left in its wake are still here. What has happened is especially painful to think about as a parent of an African American boy. It's unbelievable that someone can just walk away scot-free after killing a young, unarmed teen. Shocking. Chilling. Heartbreaking. Though, more so than the not guilty verdict itself is what the conclusion of this trial tells the world. Perhaps no one put it better than Trayvon Martin's own mother.

Speaking out for the first time, Sybrina Fulton told NBC's Today:

Sending a terrible message to other little black and brown boys -- that you can't walk fast, you can't walk slow. So what do they do? I mean, how do you get home without people knowing or either assuming that you're doing something wrong? Trayvon wasn't doing anything wrong.

More from The Stir: Trayvon Martin's Mom Forced to Listen to Her Son Dying in Court (VIDEOS)

It really is a frightening reality that few of us know how to prepare our children for. So what are we parents to do? My husband and I have given this a lot of thought in recent days. As soon as our son, now 5, is a few years older, we will have to tell him that there are times he will be judged unfairly because of the way he looks. That because he is black, his life could be put in danger even if he has done nothing wrong. We don't want to terrify him, but we can't have him walking around blind to the realities of this world. Just the thought of this conversation overwhelms me with sadness. 

But let's be honest here. It's not just wannabe vigilantes like George Zimmerman that pose a threat. Police profiling certainly can play a dangerous part too. There have been numerous cases of cops stopping or harassing black men who turn out to be innocent of any wrongdoing. When I was growing up and even today, friends and family members called it, "Driving while black." It's the notion that because of your skin color, you are more likely to be pulled over. It happens to everyone -- doctors, lawyers, even politicians of color. Years ago, a family friend and his son were stopped by police and beaten so badly he was hospitalized for days. It was a case of mistaken identity.

Reportedly, Lavar Burton takes his hat off and says "Sir" whenever he is pulled over by the cops. But is this capitulation for the sake of survival really fair? Of course not. I have a hard time accepting that I should have to teach my son to treat a racist with reverence just so that he may live. That is just infuriating. That whole concept is just infuriating.

It's incredible to me that we are still asking the world to judge people by the content of their character rather than the color of their skin. Martin Luther King, Jr. must be rolling over in his grave. We have come so far in many ways, but are still far behind in ones that matter. This just feels like a game we cannot win. I am raising my child to be a hardworking, educated, ethical human being. Sadly, that just won't be what some will see.

What will you tell your children about what happened to Trayvon Martin?

Image via T. Ron Scott/Flickr

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Ericka Sóuter

is a veteran pop culture and celeb news writer. That experience boils down to two things: she knows way too much about the Kardashians and she dominates on Trivial Pursuit's arts and entertainment questions.

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