10 Ways You Know You're Whipped

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by Emily Abbate 3 hours ago

Relationships do funny things to your opinions. Like one second, you could absolutely despise Kanye West, and the next, when the person you're dating can't get enough of him, you find yourself boppin' along to his music while making dinner. Of course, that's a loose example. Oftentimes when you're committed, the things that bothered you before about the opposite sex aren't as big of a deal when it comes to your man. Oftentimes, you forget about certain things or habits that really matter to you because you have someone that really matters to you.

I'm talking dirty. I'm talking disgusting. I'm talking instances where you totally would have freaked out a few months back if you saw some stranger doing the same thing your lover is doing now. I hate to tell ya, girlfriend, but if you're not freaking out about some of these gross and highly annoying habits -- you're probably whipped.

Here, check out these 10 ways you know you're whipped:

1. Your man leaves the seat up; you say nothing: I don't know ANY woman who doesn't get a tad annoyed when her man leaves the seat up in the bathroom.

2. He digs for gold at the dinner table; you pretend you don't notice: I'm sorry, but the table is NO place for boogers. Pretending you don't notice that casual nose scratch is a red flag that you're head-over-heels.

3. You're the big joke: Whereas you used to shine every once in a while with your funny "jokes" (that probably weren't all that funny to begin with), now your significant other gets to rag on you all the time and you don't stop him. That cute arm-around-the-shoulder move he does afterward makes it all OK.

4. Upon waking up, you don't get angry when he turns on SportsCenter instead of Today: Instead, you look for your news on your iPad rather than listening to Kathie Lee and Hoda joke about the headlines while drinking wine. Same thing, sort of?

5. You find his mismatched clothing cute, not pathetic: The man is old enough to know that salmon pink doesn't match with aqua marine. For some crazy reason, though, you just aren't fazed.

6. You don't correct his horrible social media grammar: Oh god. Personally, the day that I keep my opinions to myself about my man's social media habits is a day I fear. Maybe that's just because I'm a writer.

7. You make excuses as to why him being late for date night is OK: For the record, it's not okay unless there's some real emergency. Last time I checked, catching the end of a baseball game before walking out the door didn't classify. Not flinching when he doesn't let you know he'll be 30 minutes late? Yeah, you're in deep.

8. You don't miss your friends even though you haven't seen them in three weeks: This is always a clear indication of whipped status. Who needs friends when you can have a late but unapologetic significant other?

9. You've allowed him to borrow your iPod ... for three weeks: It's one thing to let someone borrow your stuff. It's another to pretend you don't miss it while they're enjoying the benefits of the newest John Mayer album.

10. He smells and you don't tell him: You should tell him. Being polite under such crucial circumstances is not what he needs. He needs the truth. Never be too whipped to tell your man he has B.O.

Have you ever been whipped? How did you know?

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