Lots of Sex Can Earn You Lots of Money Says Best Study Ever

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by Sasha Brown-Worsham 20 hours ago

A new study has revealed that there is a very simple equation to making more money: More Sex= More happiness= More Money. Yes, indeed. The study found that people who have sex four times a week generally earn more than people who do not. The reasons, however, may not be as simple as they appear.

This study is not suggesting that going out and having more sex will automatically increase your income. What it IS suggesting is that more sex leads to more happiness and that happy people tend to make more as a whole than unhappy people. Of course, what this study CAN'T account for is the reality that people who make more money are going to be more attractive to the opposite sex and thus, have more opportunities for sex... So, really, this study is not exactly going to change lives.

Still, I am going with it. My takeaway: I need to have more sex.

After 10 years of marriage, I am close to four times a week. Some weeks are better than that, some slightly worse, but now I am feeling we can do better than that. We can blow this baby up! And clearly we should. It will make us much happier.

The truth is, there is no magic "happy" number. Every couple is different. But it absolutely IS true that hitting your individual "happy" number makes you a generally better person to be around. That whole expression "he needs to get laid?" Yeah. It exists for a reason.

People who are lacking in sex show it. The part I struggle with is that happier people make more money. Again, it's a chicken or egg kind of thing. Money may not buy happiness, but if you have been poor, then you sure as hell know that not having money won't make you happy, either. If you are stressing about money, sex is usually the last thing on your mind.

So this study is...  dubious. And yet, it's also welcome. Because what two things do we like better than sex and money? Not much else, amiright?

Will this study make you have more sex?

Image via Dustin Moore /Flickr

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Sasha Brown-Worsham

can't decide whether she is a mother, writer, or runner, but is usually all three at some point each day. She has written for dozens of print magazines, newspapers, and websites. She rarely ever writes on bathroom walls.

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